Friday Letters

Its been awhile since I've done some good old Friday Letters, so here goes nothing!

 

Dear amazing people who read this blog-

FIVE MILLION PAGE VIEWS?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!!!  Insert peeing my pants here. Thank you for reading this space, even when life makes me neglect it.  I have tons of ideas I want to post on, and in the coming weeks I want to get back to this space more. I love you all so very much and thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Dear Grayson- Baby boy, I love you more than words can say. I'm so excited to have the summer off to spend with you but I really think that it is entirely unfair that when Daddy is home or you are at Aiyas house you sleep till 10. With Mommy, you're up at 7:30. Cut this crap out, okay? Mommy is tired and will be in a much better mood if she sleeps in.  Also, changing your diaper isn't a punishment so please stop screaming as such before the neighbors call CYS on Mommy.

XOXO-

Momma

 

Dear Hubs-

You do realize its not a crime for you to empty/fill the dishwasher, correct? Same goes for changing the toilet paper roll. Other than that, I love your guts. However if that dishwasher thing doesn't change you are going to be eating off of paper plates until you get the idea.

Love Your Guts!

 

Dear Outer Banks-

August 2nd can not come fast enough. Now,  I do not want to wish summer away but I can not wait to squish my toes in the sand and smell the salty air.

 

Now if you could just make sure the weather is fab that week, I would really appreciate it.

XOXO,

The lady who REALLY needs a vacation

 

Dear Mother Nature-

Now I totally get that with summer heat comes the possibility for thunderstorms, but can we catch a freaking break?! It has rained every day since summer started. Just once I would like to make a pool date so I can get a little bit of a tan. Please?!

Sincerely-

The entirely too white girl.

 

Dear Wonderful Peeps at Jif-

Thank you for making the peanut butter and chocolate spread. It is worth every extra minute I have to spend hating life on the treadmill or making a fool of myself at Zumba to indulge in your deliciousness. People have said to try PB2 with Chocolate because its "the same". They are liars.  I secretly want to spread you on all the things because you are that good, but as a big girl I will refrain. And no, that wasn't me sneaking downstairs at three am to spread you on a pretzel rod. I have no idea what you are talking about. Now, can we talk about a zero calorie version?!

Sincerely-

The girl who is clearly delusional.

 

Happy Friday, Friends!!

Friday Letters

WOO! Its Friday- and the humidity around here has finally taken a break, which is amazing all in its own, because my hair will no longer look like a q-tip plastered to my head. (Ill give you a second to let that visual image seep in...team messy bun over here all the way!) Anyway- since my mind is a mish of random today, I decided it was time to write some Friday letters!

 

Dear Grayson Boy- Mommy LOVE LOVE LOVES the fact that you adore toddler gym. However, if you could kindly stop scaling every piece of furniture in the house like it's your job, that would be great. Mommy can't take you to gym class if she's in the cardiac wing at AGH.

 

Dear Rain- What the heck is up with the rainiest summer ever? Three inches in two hours is not cool. Granted we didn't get flooded out up here on the hill, but a lot of other people did and it's time to give it a rest. Oh and btw, three days without the chance of rain isn't really a rest when we've had 11 straight days with rain. Isn't there a desert in a drought somewhere you can go hang for awhile?

 

Dear Fur Babies- Thank you for being so nice to the tiny human. Being ridden like a personal pony can be rough, but I know you put up with it because he'll share his snacks with you. That kid loves you, and I know you love him- even if he won't give you his cheerios.

 

Dear Momma- Grayson said he would really, really like it if you made him some banana drop cookies from his great grandmas recipe.  Mommy tried to make them for him and she burned them to a crisp- it was totally the oven's fault- but he still would like some. And he promises to share with his Mommy, because you taught him sharing is important.

 

Dear Beach- I.can.not.wait!  Fifteen more days and I plan to plant myself firmly on your sandy shore and come home not so pale. I'm super excited to see Grayson love you as well, and I'm putting in my request now for nice weather. Hear that rain? You are not welcome!

 

Dear Blog Friends- Thank you all for the sweet emails I have received this week. You are all amazing and I love you all to bits. I love hearing from all of you, so feel free to send me an email and I promise Ill respond! Its so fun to keep in touch with you guys- and I would MUCH rather return emails at naptime rather than do laundry!

 

Dear Hubs- Thank you for the sweet things you do. The Turners Tea that appeared in my fridge was amazing and the new box of Loft goodies that arrived with the tag "for you for the beach" are just two reasons you are the best husband ever. I love you to pieces.

 

Dear Weekend- WOO! Two days without rain in the forecast, you better bet we'll be taking advantage of you. Zoo, splash-pad, park- the options are endless but I hope you'll be wonderful! And if on the off chance that you can add an extra day into the weekend, I know you would make a lot of people extremely happy! Give it a shot, please?

 

Happy Weekend, Lovelies!

 

 

 

Monday Letters

Dear Husband- I love you dearly, but if you continue to snore like a freight train you will be permanently relocated to the guest room.  Also, that strange box in the kitchen is a dishwasher and it is A-Okay to put your dirty dishes in it. Really, it will not kill you and if it does I will apologise to your corpse.  Love, Your Tired Wife.

Dear Grayson Boy- Thank you for sleeping in until 7 this morning, Momma likes to sleep and its very much appreciated.  If you shoot for 8 AM tomorrow I will buy you a pony and let you eat ice cream for breakfast (not really, but Ill call your eggs and fruit ice cream). XOXO- Mommy

Dear Kaos and Gizzy Bear- Please explain to me why you always feel its appropriate to start barking as SOON as Grayson falls asleep for no apparent reason? Are you punishing me or torturing him? I cant decide. I'm going to start getting even, I will let Grayson help when you get your bath- and I know you don't want that. Love Always- Momma  

Dear People In My Neighborhood- In no uncertain circumstances are bedroom slippers considered appropriate footwear for the grocery store/gas station/post office.  You are not fooling anyone by us thinking they are Ugg like with the fur around the edges, when in fact they came from WalMart. Also ladies- please put on a bra, no one deserves that assault over bananas in the produce section. Love- The lady shaking her head at you and trying not to laugh.

Dear Mother Nature- I love the nice warm weather, don't get me wrong.  What I do not appreciate, however, is the humidity that makes my hair look like a Brillo pad on steroids.  I also do not appreciate breaking a sweat while I brush my teeth. Can we cut that crap out for awhile? Thanks! Sincerely- The girl who just wants her straight hair back.

Dear Facebook Friends- Please stop broadcasting every detail of your life in status updates. No one cares and we all know half of what you post are lies. The same goes for you posting pictures of yourself in bathrooms with duck lips- not cute, or with expensive things and bragging about them. I don't care if you have a BMW, a Louis Vuitton bag, or a famous extremely distant relative who you took a picture with once when you were five. High School was over almost 10 years ago and Im sorry you didn't realize that but you are not making anyone jealous, no matter how many pictures you caption with "People always be jelly of how supa fly I am. SMH.". Learn to spell and shut up. Sincerely- The girl hitting unfriend as we speak.